Friday, November 9, 2007

Things were going fine. Had my first ultrasound and there was the little alien, heartbeat just a fluttering. I was excited. J was ecstatic. Everything was fine. I never had morning sickness. I did get a little upset tummy if I ate certain foods, greasy or buttery stuff mainly. I learned quickly to avoid that! Around 18 weeks, I had pains that never went away, so I got another ultrasound. Things still looked good. The doctor said I was just stretching and growing. Take a Tylenol if things get too rough. Then I started to get sick. Not throwing up, just really felt run down (more than usual as I had EXTREME fatigue!). Found out that I had an infected tooth, and made an appointment at the dentist. Ha. Little did I realize that I could NOT have any type of sedation. I am highly afraid of the dentist. And pain. Can't forget about pain. I never thought about childbirth (I'm very good at eluding subjects, especially on myself!), so I never got freaked out about the pain it would cause! Anyhow..back to the dentist. I had to take antibiotics to clear the infection first so that I could have it taken out. And BOY did it need taken out! So yeah..I endured a tooth pull with only the lidocane. Something I will never ever do ever again for as long as I live! A couple weeks after that. I went into labor. Coincidence? Maybe. But I did a lot of research, and found out that problems with your teeth can cause pre-term labor. Go look it up. Seriously. I'll wait here. (Insert Jeopardy music here) OK then..see..I told you so. Freaky.

Nothing really happened to start my labor, I guess. J. went to enroll in school for diesel tech. and was taking a test. I started bleeding. Of course I'm freaking out. After my miscarriage, things like that would probably always freak me out. So I called my doc. They said to drink a ton of water, lie on my left side and take it easy, they would call me back. An hour went by, and in that hour I called J. at the school, and he said he was done with his test, and on his way home. He got home, asked me what was going on, and we both decided to no longer wait for a phone call, we went straight into the hospital to get checked out. I get up there, get changed in a gown, and they start the process of checking everything. Blood, urine, anything for a reason for the bleeding. I actually had a witch of a nurse tell me that I probably just had the flu. After all, it was going around. She went out and a LOVELY NICE nurse took her place. She really was super sweet and really cared about what was going on. Not like the wicked witch of the west that I had just had. She said she was sorry, but she had to do a cervix check. I told her no problem, I expected it. So she's doing her thing, and she gets real quiet and her eyes get huge. My heart immediately started racing. What the hell was that look for??! What's going on??! She said she would be right back and literally ran out of the room, hollering for the other mean nurse. They both came back in, and had mean nurse lady do another cervix check. She sat down next to me, sent the other nurse to call my OB, and told me I was dilating. My cervix was soft and membranes bulging. I was just over 24 weeks pregnant.

No. You are kidding me. It's not time. No no no NO NO NO! You are wrong, you are both wrong!! Fix it! This is what I was screaming in my head. On the outside, I was shocked. I was silent, I had no idea how to react. My OB was on the way, she dropped all her patients, and is coming straight over (office was only a minute from the hospital). She did a check on my cervix too. By this time I was seriously feeling like a hand puppet. Yeah, how's that for a visual! They flipped me on my head, I have IV's being inserted left and right, I had medications going in at an alarmingly fast rate. Steroid shot, and then was told another would be administered in 24 hours. An ambulance was called to transport me to a much bigger hospital.

I went from a small town hospital to a big city one that specialized in preemies. Complete bed rest. Mag sulfate. No food for 3 days. Bedpan. Yeah..the bedpan sucked. Majorly. Nothing like taking a crap in a little tiny tub...oh yeah..did I mention they gave me colace. A laxative. Every day..twice a day. poor hubby. Days went by. Baby was great, heartbeat was fine and it looked like I was going to stay there until delivery. I was having ultrasounds every day, and and NST's every day as well. I finally got my own bedside toilet. It's the small things, people! J. finally had to leave to go back to work or risk being fired. We did still have bills and the world did turn even though I thought it shouldn't. It was day 7 of bed rest. When he left that afternoon, I held it together until he left. Then I broke down and cried. I had to quickly calm myself because I did not want to throw myself into having more contractions. You know, the ones that I WAS not feeling. When I left the small town hospital, I was at a 2-3, when I got to the big city hospital, I was at a definite 3. Membranes bulging the whole way. So I calmed myself down and started on things that people had given me. Coloring books (you would not believe how calming coloring is!!), crossword puzzles. Eating all the snacks people provided me. It was great, or..something like that. I talked to J. on the phone on day 8. I told him I missed him greatly, as our home was an hour away, he couldn't exactly come on in for a quick visit.I again, cried on the phone, but tried to hide it and did a good job of it. I was absolutely lonely. Hardly anyone came to visit due to school and work, and it really sucked. I had a cervix check that night and the next morning, I was bleeding some. It was early early in the morning that I noticed an increase. They kept telling me it was because of the check, it irritated things and it would be OK. I hadn't dilated anymore, I wasn't leaking fluid anymore. All seemed to be going well. J. called me and I voiced my concerns over bleeding to him. He tried to calm me down as well. I was calm for the most part, and in the last hour, had just convinced myself that things were OK! I reached up to grab onto the bed rails to pull myself into a sitting position when I felt weird.

My favorite nurse was my nurse today. So I rang her. She came in to check. Blood, and lots of it. Shit. She called the doc, and she came in and did a check again. I was at 7cm. SEVEN, people. I felt nothing. I went from being a 2 last night, to a 7. I was almost ready to push. I got so scared, my knees were shaking, my whole body was shaking. Then J. appeared out of the chaos. I wasn't expecting him to come up, but he said he just felt the need to all the sudden. I told him what was going on, what was happening and I saw his face fall, and worry and fear creep into his eyes. I hate seeing that in my husband. I knew he felt so powerless, he has put me first in his life, has always made sure I had whatever I needed, that I was safe and well cared for. And now his wife, and his baby where in dire trouble and there was nothing he could do.

I decided to get the epidural. I have no idea why. I wasn't even feeling contractions, so why get one? I wasn't in any pain. I still, to this day, think it was the best decision ever. Something told me to get that epidural and I listened without hesitation. It was horrid. It was a teaching hospital and lucky for me, I was the student that day. It took them 35-40 minutes to put it in. I cried the whole time. It was horrible. See, I already have a bad back from an injury, so that was making things even more complicated for them. Finally it was in and it took! Then came in the doc.

She wanted to do another check. Sure, I thought, why not, it's not going to hurt anything now. She looks at me and tells me to not move. Feels around some more (hand puppet people, hand puppet!!). She said that the baby's cord is prolapsing. This is an immediate danger and can be deadly to the baby within seconds. She runs out to call the head of the OB department. Head of OB agrees. Immediate C-section. Now I know I got that epidural for a reason! I knew something in my gut was telling me to get it now before/if things got worse. If I hadn't have gotten the epidural, I would have been put under. That is also very dangerous. I'm glad I went with my gut instinct.

Up next...S's birth.

1 Comment:

  1. Carrie said...
    I'm glad to finally get to hear all of the details about this. It's so sad and scary and I know that you probably finish each entry teary-eyed and exhausted.

Post a Comment