Saturday, April 28, 2012

Another Year Down

So it wasn't bad, I was really busy on Thursday. I had a doctor's appointment and a medicine to fill and lots to think about. So that kept my mind off of the birth day.

So yeah. The doctor. He's my pain specialist and I see him every 2-3 months. He's been really helpful for me. He decided that since my leg is weak and painful, that it's time that I walked with a cane when walking for long distances. Another thing he wants me to look into is something called Spinal Cord Stimulation Therapy. It's basically a device, that has leads running up your spinal column, and it's attached to something that will send electrical impulses that will "mask" the pain signals being sent to your brain. The masked signals then travel to the brain where they are often perceived or felt as a smooth, tingling sensation called paresthesia. This sensation reduces the feeling of pain.You can test drive the device before having it permanently implanted under the skin in your buttocks region.

But, to do the test drive and to have it permanently implanted, they do a procedure that's pretty much like an epidural and I'm am just not down with that! I do not want another needle in my back. I didn't fare too well with the epidural during S's birth. For one thing, it took them 45 freekin' minutes to place the stinkin' thing! Secondly, after I had S, I got horrendous neck and shoulder pain. No one could figure it out, and I finally told the nurse that if that epidural wasn't removed from my back, I was going to take it out myself. Needless to say, the nurse got the anesthesiologist down to me in about 10 minutes. They said it wasn't the epidural that was making me have so much pain in my neck and shoulders, but, as soon as it was removed, I had no pain whatsoever. So yeah, not only does having an epidural hurt me badly, but it also causes me to have a HUGE HUGE HUUUUGGGEEEE panic attacks. I cry, shake, my blood pressure and heart rate soar, I hyperventilate and nearly black out. I've had two doctors now, who have had to quit even before we start. So having it done for this new therapy for the trial run, and to implant it permanently, would probably cause me to have a heart attack. Not kidding, either.

Lastly, it would be something else that was in my back. Another device. Another piece of equipment. I just don't know if I could mentally and emotionally handle that. I haven't really gotten used to the idea that I'll be 34 this October and I use a cane.

Totally did not see all this coming. I thought I'd have my surgery, take some time to recover, and have a part time job while the kids are in school during the day. But, that's just not happening, so for now, I'm just going to maintain and try to stay out of pain as much as I can. I'm so very torn on what do.

Here's a photo of the device:


Post a Comment