Friday, January 20, 2012
I really really don't know how much longer I can go with these sleeping problems. I'm exhausted. I'm so tired all the time, even if J lets me sleep in or take a nap on the weekends, I feel literally drained.
Almost 7 years of wrestling with sleep would be enough to set anyone off the deep end. I either don't sleep all night, get the kids on the bus and then take a nap, or go to bed at night and only sleep a few hours before waking up again.
J keeps telling me: "Stay awake all day, stay awake all day, then you'll sleep all night and your sleeping will be back to normal". Do you know how very hard it is to stay awake all day when the housework and things are pretty much done? I don't trust myself to drive anywhere, for fear I'll fall asleep while driving. Do you know how hard it is to stay awake when you've only gotten a few hours of sleep in a 24-48 hour period. Can't be done unless I start taking some no doze stuff. Energy drinks don't work for me and they taste like what cat urine smells like. Bleck.
I guess my next step will somehow have to be getting to a sleep doctor. J works 3rd shift, and even though Fridays are supposed to be their days off, they do work overtime on that day and you never know which Friday you are going to work. They can spring it on them Thursday night. So it's not that easy to just up and make an appointment there when they are only there from Monday-Friday.
Things have gotten a lot worse over the last few months. Some changes I've noticed have been:
- Increase in stress when dealing with the kids and husband.
- Increase in being in a horrible, bitchy mood at all times.
- Increase in being very weepy and crying a lot over things.
- Increase in headaches.
- Increase in full body aches.
- Increase in my back hurting.
- Increase of pain in between my shoulders, right in the middle, which goes up through my neck and causes pain in my neck.
- Lack of concentration.
- Memory problems.
- Energy problems.
- Loss of coordination at times.
- Lack of being able to plan and stick to those plans.
- Not being able to get my words out right when speaking, or words getting jumbled around.
- My typing skills have gone to crap, and I used to be a very good and fast typer.
Here are some facts about insomnia:
"It is estimated that approximately 70 million American adults are affected by insomnia – characterized by difficulty falling asleep, waking frequently during the night, waking too early and not being able to return to sleep, or waking up not feeling refreshed. One study has found that only 20% of insomnia sufferers are being treated with a prescription sleep medication.
Results from a recent National Sleep Foundation Sleep in America poll reported that respondents experienced the following at least a few nights a week:
•65% experience insomnia symptoms,
•nearly 50% wake up feeling unrefreshed,
•42% awake often during the night, and
•nearly 30% wake up too early and can not get back to sleep.
An estimated 20% to 40% of all adults complain of acute, or transient, insomnia, generally defined as a complaint lasting several days up to a couple of weeks, while 10% to 15% complain of chronic insomnia, generally defined as a complaint lasting approximately four weeks or longer. The negative health consequences of insomnia are becoming better understood. Studies have shown that insomnia lasting more than four weeks is associated with a wide range of adverse health conditions, including mood disturbances, depression, difficulties with concentration and memory, and certain cardiovascular, pulmonary and gastrointestinal disorders. Chronic sleep deprivation has also been associated with an increased risk of diabetes and obesity. One study showed that when normal sleep was restricted by as little as two hours per night across two weeks, the affected person experienced a significant decrease in cognitive function that resulted in reaction time and other performance measures resembling those of a person who stayed up for 48 hours straight."
It may be in bad form, but I can see why Micheal Jackson resorted to those heavy drugs to help him sleep. Ambien just doesn't cut it anymore. I've been on it more times than I care to count and after a while, they just don't work. I've even tried other things like Melatonin and Chamomile Tea. Didn't get far with the tea though, it's HORRID tasting! Over the counter stuff has just lost it's edge and all of my docs now want me to go get a sleep study test done....
Which leads me back to having no one to help with the kiddos while I go have one done.
But, I'm afraid if I don't do something soon, I'm going to crack completely and be thrown in a nut house and then what? I seriously do not want to have a mental breakdown over lack of sleep and the stress it causes me.
I don't look good in white, and I'm claustrophobic.