Thursday, May 14, 2009
Don't get me wrong, I am so ready for S to go to school. To see him blossom and learn and around peers and make friends. I'm VERY ready for him to go to school. I think some Mommy time for A would be good. S is always teasing and picking at him, it's really wearing on my nerves. Especially when all A does is screech at S in return for picking on him. Oh the screeching. My head hurts just thinking about it. I'm sad to say that bedtime is often my most favorite time of the day. But, I'm always greeted with a wonderful "Hi MOMMY!!!" when I wake up, and that makes everything all better again. Well..until the screeching begins. Let's not go there.
Anyhow. I am happy S is going to school. But wow. Does it bring out emotions you never thought you had. "Will he be ok? Will he Listen to the teacher? Will he make friends? Will he get picked on? Will he be able to keep up with the other students? Will he get in trouble a lot? Will. He. Be. Ok?" It's hard to give up your child to the hands of another person. All he's had is me and daddy and brother and home life. This will be such a total change for him. I just want him to be ok. Why aren't parents allowed to have a crystal ball? Just for looking in the near future. I want to protect him, but I know that I'm not going to be able to do that when he goes to school. I know deep down this is the best for him, but damn if it doesn't bring out the anxiety in me.
I'm glad J is going to be going with us the first day of school. Everyone thinks that S won't be able to let go, but I really think that I'M the one that's going to have to be dragged out of there.
Also? I just know I'll cry.
Being a parent sucks.